Game Dev Memes

Some of these are pretty good.

Some make me embarassed to post on these forums. Some of you make larpers look like james dean, lol.

I thought I was the biggest nerd in the universe, until I visited this thread. Now I feel like a jock.

Er I mean....FOOTBALL!!!!!!

 

You win this thread.

 

New programming jargons:
http://blog.codinghorror.com/new-programming-jargon/


2. Pokémon Exception Handling




For when you just Gotta Catch 'Em All so the game works despite having dozens of internal exceptions...

Code (CSharp):

1.  
2. try {
3. }
4. catch (Exception ex) {
5. // Gotcha!
6. }

5. A Duck



A feature added for no other reason than to draw management attention and be removed, thus avoiding unnecessary changes in other aspects of the product.

I don't know if I actually invented this term or not, but I am certainly not the originator of the story that spawned it.

This started as a piece of Interplay corporate lore. It was well known that producers (a game industry position, roughly equivalent to PMs) had to make a change to everything that was done. The assumption was that subconsciously they felt that if they didn't, they weren't adding value.

The artist working on the queen animations for Battle Chess was aware of this tendency, and came up with an innovative solution. He did the animations for the queen the way that he felt would be best, with one addition: he gave the queen a pet duck. He animated this duck through all of the queen's animations, had it flapping around the corners. He also took great care to make sure that it never overlapped the "actual" animation.

Eventually, it came time for the producer to review the animation set for the queen. The producer sat down and watched all of the animations. When they were done, he turned to the artist and said, "that looks great. Just one thing - get rid of the duck."


10. Jimmy




A generalized name for the clueless/new developer.

Found as we were developing a framework component that required minimal knowledge of how it worked for the other developers. We would always phrase our questions as: "What if Jimmy forgets to update the attribute?"

This led to the term: "Jimmy-proof" when referring to well designed framework code.

 

Bug reports


1. BloomBug.
A bug that unintentionally generates money. A bug in the calculation of HP, MP, number of bullets and/or health packs, that causes players to lose, or unable to complete the mission. This is intentionally there. Won't be fixed.


2. HeisenBug
A bug that disappears or alters its characteristics when an attempt is made to study it.


3. HindenBug - a catastrophic data destroying bug. May cause player to lose all his IAP purchases.


4. Mad girlfriend bug - a bug whose immediate effect remains hidden - the app outwardly seems to function normally and tells you that everything is fine. Caused by catching too many exceptions.


4. QuantumBug. A bug which the gamer reports. When doing a web-meeting, and/or a phone session with the gamer, the bug mysteriously disappears. Later, the gamer reports it. Then the developers get on a call to the gamer next week. Gamer doesn't respond and bug totally disappears and never heard again.


5. Excalibur Bug - when all of the developers within a company have tried to fix a particular bug but none are worthy have succeeded, so far.

 

Spoiler: What I think of indie devs who say "we" when they're really alone.

 

Thanks guys. Lots of great memes. This one really made me laugh.

 

I take it there's a new story behind that one @eskimojoe ?

 

It's the same as the CEO issue and dubious degree issue. That person set-up a non-existent Institute and starts to solicit others for non-accredited game development courses. He cannot code and tries to join other teams, or seek employment as a developer.

I just wish he would grow-up and realise that he's wasting his time pulling wool on other people's eyes.

if you are a teacher, you need to have a master's degree to teach bachelor's degree, or at least a bachelor's degree with a teaching diploma.

That person gets surprised an University ex-lecturer who question him on his job interview.


And others too:

• Fake studio artist meets a real studio ex-artist. You can imagine the hilarity that ensue.
• Fake CEO meets a real CEO of a 100+ game studio company. CEO objective: Getting rid of idea guys is #1 priority to maintain steady cash-flow.
• Fake Ph.D. person meets a real Ph.D person. Couldn't answer anything on his thesis...
• Fake Microsoft person meets a real Microsoft ex-employee. That guy knows nothing.
• Fake Marketing person who resorts to buying fake FB likes, Youtube views and fake Tweets
• Fake artist who outsources his job overseas...

This forum has the best entertainment and school of hard knocks education you can get

 

@smitchell, keep learning. Don't let 'we' in your head criticise you. One day, when you learned all, you can become an expert in what you do, and make the best games.


Remember, that 'we' does not exist in real life.

 

huh? I'm confused, I never said "Which person..." :S

 

I'm refactoring code and this will result in the removal of this function. I thought I'd save it here for posterity.

 

That's a TheDailyWTF entry right there. Bonus points for the ps -al reference subtly woven in.

 

So, you mean "never"?

 

It's not like I'm talking to myself. It's like there are several people inside my head, each with a different personality, talking to each other.

 

If that isn't the definition of schizophrenia idk what is lol.

 

Roses are Red. Violets are blue.
I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

Although to be fair, to a certain extent you have to be this way, if your development requires you to wear multiple hats.

 

That's kinda true, well it's only schizophrenia if you're arguing or fighting with yourself haha.

 

'we' agree

 

That's multiple-personality disorder, not schizophrenia. Granted, if it's a borderline case it can be hard to distinguish.

 

I did not beat myself up last night. I fell down a flight of stairs.
Ghost Nappa: You tell 'em, Asvarduil!

 

omg that poem is great, gonna have to quote that sometime

 

The first rule of fight club....

 

This thread is amazing. We should make a game that just cycles through all of these memes and call it "The Stress Reliever Game: Game Industry Edition".

 

My partner knows how to bring my enthusiasm down. Hahaha!

 

Get help before you go out of control.

 

Can I use this whenever a rabid feminist half-asses their arguments? It would be so funny.

Don't get me wrong, I'm not at all against women having a place in the gaming or dev community. Just, the 'grand conspiracy against women' thing is a bit old. For one thing, they clearly forgot to send me the memo.

 

A team posts a link to their website which contains a 100% identical clone of Flappy Bird.

TEAM: Flappy Bird moves from mobile to PC with a new title: "Flappy Bird PC Version"!
COMMENTERS: Uh? Did you do it as an exercise?
TEAM: Nono it's our game.
COMMENTERS: Saying that a 100% clone is "your" game is not very nice.
TEAM: It's like our child!

(true story)

 

If Unity came with product warnings...

 

ha, I saw that on 9gag

 

More like "I just wanted to make next gen FPS game"

 

In Discrete Structures I had many a moment like this. But, it was worth it.

 

@Aiursrage2k Wha tha fuua did I just spend thirty seconds of my live in a comatose state for?

 

Anti Patterns
http://sourcemaking.com/antipatterns/software-development-antipatterns

• The Blob
  Procedural-style design leads to one object with a lion’s share of the responsibilities, while most other objects only hold data or execute simple processes. The solution includes refactoring the design to distribute responsibilities more uniformly and isolating the effect of changes.

• Continuous Obsolescence
  Technology is changing so rapidly that developers often have trouble keeping up with current versions of software and finding combinations of product releases that work together. Given that every commercial product line evolves through new releases, the situation is becoming more difficult for developers to cope with. Finding compatible releases of products that successfully interoperate is even harder.

• Lava Flow
  Dead code and forgotten design information is frozen in an ever-changing design. This is analogous to a Lava Flow with hardening globules of rocky material. The refactored solution includes a configuration management process that eliminates dead code and evolves or refactors design toward increasing quality.

• Ambiguous Viewpoint
  Object-oriented analysis and design (OOA&D) models are often presented without clarifying the viewpoint represented by the model. By default, OOA&D models denote an implementation viewpoint that is potentially the least useful. Mixed viewpoints don’t allow the fundamental separation of interfaces from implementation details, which is one of the primary benefits of the object-oriented paradigm.

• Functional Decomposition
  This AntiPattern is the output of experienced, nonobject-oriented developers who design and implement an application in an object-oriented language. The resulting code resembles a structural language (Pascal, FORTRAN) in class structure. It can be incredibly complex as smart procedural developers devise very “clever” ways to replicate their time-tested methods in an object-oriented architecture.

• Poltergeists
  Poltergeists are classes with very limited roles and effective life cycles. They often start processes for other objects. The refactored solution includes a reallocation of responsibilities to longer-lived objects that eliminate the Poltergeists.

• Boat Anchor
  A Boat Anchor is a piece of software or hardware that serves no useful purpose on the current project. Often, the Boat Anchor is a costly acquisition, which makes the purchase even more ironic.

• Golden Hammer
  A Golden Hammer is a familiar technology or concept applied obsessively to many software problems. The solution involves expanding the knowledge of developers through education, training, and book study groups to expose developers to alternative technologies and approaches.

• Dead End
  A Dead End is reached by modifying a reusable component if the modified component is no longer maintained and supported by the supplier. When these modifications are made, the support burden transfers to the application system developers and maintainers. Improvements in the reusable component are not easily integrated, and support problems can be blamed upon the modification.

• Spaghetti Code
  Ad hoc software structure makes it difficult to extend and optimize code. Frequent code refactoring can improve software structure, support software maintenance, and enable iterative development.

• Input Kludge
  Software that fails straightforward behavioral tests may be an example of an input kludge, which occurs when ad hoc algorithms are employed for handling program input.

• Walking through a Minefield
  Using today’s software technology is analogous to walking through a high-tech mine field. Numerous bugs are found in released software products; in fact, experts estimate that original source code contains two to five bugs per line of code.

• Cut-and-Paste Programming
  Code reused by copying source statements leads to significant maintenance problems. Alternative forms of reuse, including black-box reuse, reduce maintenance issues by having common source code, testing, and documentation.

• Mushroom Management
  In some architecture and management circles, there is an explicit policy to keep system developers isolated from the system’s end users. Requirements are passed second-hand through intermediaries, including architects, managers, or requirements analysts.

 

Refuctoring - http://www.waterfall2006.com/Refuctoring.pdf

What Is Refuctoring?

Refuctoring is the process of taking a well- designed piece of code and, through a series of small, reversible changes, making it completely unmaintainable by anybody except yourself. Comprehensive regression testing guarantees that nobody will be any the wiser.

 

That one summarises up my entire experience of Xcode.

 

So, we translate our code into pig latin?

Seems like a perfectly viable, productive way of coding. I'll be sure to do that immediately.

 

Is lorem ipsem not a programming language yet?

 

It'd never work. Lorem ipsum is only five words anyways.

 

Ey? I believe it's actually quite a long passage of latin prose.

 

It's randomly generated pseudo-Latin, although the first phrase is often "Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit", which is still gibberish, but based on an actual Latin phrase.

*click* know-it-all mode disengaged, returning to meme-appreciation mode