Top 15 rules of successful indie MMO developers

As with any substantive undertaking, such as surviving a zombie apocalypse or asking Jennie out to the prom, being the visionary behind a successful indie MMO is a difficult but rewarding journey. It is, therefor, important to adhere to the following rules which practically guarantee success.

Let me preface this by saying that the following rules are for visionaries with great ideas only. All you other f**kers, get the hell out. If you don't know if you are such a visionary, ask yourself the following question:

Do I possess a skill or talent such that a reasonable business will pay me more than $15 an hour to be on staff?

If you answered 'YES,' YOU ARE NOT WELCOME HERE.

Ok, now that I've lost all the dumb f**ks who can program, animate, draw, model and compose, we can get to the first rule.

1) You're the visionary, you have a great idea, you don't need anything else. Don't even bother trying to learn things like programming or animation. They're mostly a waste of time. And you can't be wasting time. You need to put your game design document (GDD) together.

2) You need a GDD. It proves you're serious. Spend no more than two hours a day for no more than two weeks to produce this document.

3) Never, under any circumstance, show your GDD to the public. You're the idea man and putting out your GDD for public view would be like a modeler giving away his model for free. People are just going to steal your great idea or say hurtful things about why your awesome idea might not pan out.

4) Create a good company and MMO name. Recruiting for Joe Schmoe's Awesome MMORPG is going to be a lot more difficult than Excelsior Games' Islandia: The Re-Islanding. Most non-visionaries (which I may also refer to as dumb f**ks or DFs), though talented, are simple folk and easily impressed.

5) Make recruitment posts. Make them often, and bump them even more. Since you'll be making alot of these posts, don't bother putting much detail into them. Short and concise. DFs won't really understand your great idea anyway, so don't bother showing the GDD either.

6) AAA MMORPGs are made by a legion of DFs, all toiling away in their cubicle. You're an indie though, so you'll have to make do with less. Recruit atleast 10 programmers, 20 modelers, 5 animators, 2 web programmers and 10 texture artists. This will be enough. For now.

7) When it comes to recruiting, don't recruit anyone under 14. You don't need to deal with the immaturity. Require atleast an age of 16.

8) You probably don't have much money right now, but in the future, your MMO is going to be worth more than Jesus, so allude to some kind of a profit-sharing scheme in your post. You don't need to write out the specifics right now; its not like there are legal ramifications for entering into contracts like these.

9) Buy a domain name and install wordpress on it! This is important. Remember that DFs are very easily impressed. And who would spend $8 on a domain name and wordpress if they weren't dedicated to the project?

10) Respond to any criticism you may face by insisting that you are absolutely dedicated to the project. Dedication basically trumps everything else anyway. Remember that quote about a thousand monkies and a thousand typewriters producing Shakespeare? The same applies to MMOs.

11) At times, you may get too specific about your game (shouldn't have violated rule #3!!) and someone may comment that your idea isn't really technically feasable. Who does your detractor think he is? Some kind of networking engineer who has done this sort of stuff before?? This is the modern age on the INTERNET where ANYTHING is possible. Your opinion is worth as much as his facts.

12) Recruit some like minded visionaries onto your project. Give them improtant titles like 'Executive Producer' or 'Lead Developer.' When the CEO and Lead Developer of Excelsior Entertainment both respond to some scrub on the internet, you can be rest assured that the world will know.

13) Post some screenshots of the terrain and water plane you created last night. Yes, it took three whole hours, but it will really impress the DFs and prove you are serious. If you think your untextured terrain or blocky models aren't good enough, preface it by saying that they are placeholders. Thats why you need the DFs in the first place, right!!?

14) Change your vocabulary from 'I' to 'we,' as in 'we at Excelsior Entertainment.' This lends everything you say a certain amount of gravitas. Peopl-- I mean DFs respect that.

15) Sometimes, people may claim that it is impossible for you to have a great idea or manage a team without atleast some experience doing DF things. This is pure crap. The lead developers at id, Blizzard, EA and Bethesda never did any of that, ever. They let their great ideas do the talking.

Ok, with those 15 basic rules, you should be able to create an awesome MMORPG. Post here about your successes so more people follow my rules!!

 

This is just my DF opinion, but I would tone down the use of awesome.

because it just makes you look jealous.

 

I am jealous.

Jealous that I spent most of my morning reprogramming a DF Cisco ASA instead of making my awesome MMORPG.

 

Haha, pretty good! There's actually one of these going on in the showcase section right now!

 

After reading this 30 minutes ago I decided to make an MMO.

I just made $800,000.

This stuff works!

 

You just made my day. Gonna go make sum terains for my-uh... our mmorpg now.

 

In my DF opinion, I don't believe you! I know you're lying! You know how I know? Because you did not work on your GDD for 2 hours a day for 2 weeks! I think that you probably only made 1/100th of what you say you made which will barely cover the cost of your Wordpress server for the next one hundred years, give or take a decade, depending on whether you went with an expensive server ($4.95/month) or a cheap server.

 

Well, here is where my true visionary genius comes in.

I got 38 DFs to work for 45 minutes each to create the GDD while I managed them over Skype. None of them know anything about what the others are doing, so I am still able to keep the completed GDD secret.

 

I bow to your superior geniusness for making up ideas. Truly visionary.

 

Wow you are awsome want to help me maek my mmo? i cant pay you til it done thou, but you will be big on the profit.

 

I have a great MMO idea! Lets make a game like wow, but better! I wonder why no one tought about it yet!

 

In all fairness I worked with a company and created a MMO with less then 20 people. The company is bankrupt now but it was able to complete a working MMO within 2 years with less then 20 people. So you could do with less people I suppose.

 

You obviously haven't read my super-awesome GDD yet!

That was on the front page!!1!

 

I LOL'd

And that's pretty much as far as they get dont they? Make a castle model and some terribly created terrain.

You mean the GDD that goes like:

hey i want to make a mmorpg i need scripters modelers e.t.c i will maek most of the levels

it will have a shop system where you can earn these mana experience to buy new weapons.

 

This is the best post i have ever seen. Straight to the point, really recommended for anyone making a MMO. Mine is well underway and should be cooked in about 2 days

btw any DF that wana join is welcom for my aswome
real time strategy first person puzzle shooter arcade style multi player game of dooooooooom .

i m gona need 203 programmers and about 300 modelers. its gona be great i know it !

 

I have one rule i would like to add:

-Do not make MMO.

This is best rule of success for indie developer.

 

Every single successful developer started small,even the Blizzard guys.

 

I think you missed the point of the post. Clearly not a visionary.

 

When's beta start!?!!!